Friday, December 15, 2017

The Wreath Witch Curse: UPDATE

Original Post:  October 13, 2017


I work in a very large department...  not that many people, but a giant work area with a lot of unused space.  The entire building is getting refurbished one department at a time, and our old outdated vile wing was asked to consolidate itself onto one side of the wing while visiting departments can inhabit the empty side while their department wings were being stripped down and refurbished.  So it's been a couple years of new neighbors showing up every few months.  It's like getting to know and being annoyed at horrible neighbors/tenants moving in next to your home many times a year.  And knowing they're moving on to nicer homes/apartments and you're still stuck in your old one til God-knows-when.

Early this week, one of the women on the new side, without getting permission or taking a poll, hung something like this wreath (this is actually way nicer so I suspect she might have made hers).



















She hung it on the two giant automated doors at the entrance of our department (important to note she hung it on the door on OUR side of the wing).  There was great hooting and hollering on the day she brought it in and I heard her say many times "I LOVE HALLOWEEN!" (I think I might have hissed like a vampire seeing a cross).

Well, four people asked me this week:  "You put that wreath up?"

THAT wreath....the one with the striped witch legs and tiny glittery witch hat and clumps of shiny silver tulle.


UPDATE:  They fixed the door yesterday.  The door now opens mechanically, unaware that instead of a cursed wreath hanging upon it, there now hangs a weird tulle candy cane that looks more like a giant dead Christmas shrimp. 
The shrimp is un-cursed, apparently.  The door has been swinging happily all morning, and is no longer a fire hazard/place for my charred body to lay against...


17 comments:

Willow Cove said...

Is there a paper shredder in the office?
Just go in early one day...
Or
Do you have a custodial staff that comes in off hours? Slip 'em 20 bucks to do it.

Jay's Shadow said...

Hahaha! Glitter and cuteness!

I feel bad for you. You should make something and hang it in your spot and tell her “My decor is Halloween, yours is NOT.”

Rot said...

imagine if it disappears.
i'm on everyone's short list of suspects.

girl6 said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!<333
hang it next to the dead mouse mummy..the one you posted about at your work.
if it's still there that is. : D

K.O. said...

This might truly be the best anecdote I've ever read!!!!! Utterly hilarious!
Thanks for sharing. And for putting up those wreaths (haha; jk).

K.O. said...

Edit:
*THAT wreath (singular)
It's so ugly I thought there were two.

Annette09 said...

Add or make small changes to it every day. Without being discovered doing the deed, of course. Then by the 31st, it may be Rot-ified to something more palatable to you ...

Vintage Seance said...

Hahaha, they should know by now how much you despise glitter! Plus it's way too hokey - you're Halloween style is far too tasteful for them to fully grasp...

Carapace_Clavicle said...

Someone gave me a wreath much like this. Except it was red. And silver. And had elf feet sticking out. That's right; it was a Christmas wreath. I swear it weighed 50 pounds and was made of 100 yards of tulle. I still have no definitive knowledge of what happened to that wreath but it still haunts me. And every year I get another homemade gift. 2016 was rhinestone poinsettia candles. It's the thought, I suppose, or so I hear...

Sara said...

I hate glitter decor for the obvious reasons. I don't hate it when people who have bad taste also love Halloween. At least you two have soemthing in common! LOL.

Rot said...

haha
So i should set up a lunch date with this woman and discuss our differences and allow a friendship to bloom?

I'll work tulle into my display next year (I was proud that i had to look up the proper spelling of 'Tulle' for this blog post...


Staci said...

Glitter, witch legs, and tulle... That would be a true Halloween nightmare of epic proportions! {{{shudder}}}

Sara said...

I’m just saying, Walmart has that dine-in McDonald’s (as you know) and they have tons of the kinds of materials that might aid your haunt next year. Lots of glitter tulle and such and random glittery witch legs sticking out of other random Halloween decor. You can never have too many friends, Rot. ;)

Willow Cove said...

"The year or the tulle witch" hmmmmm...

Jay's Shadow said...

Haha. “Christmas Shrimp”. If you see a Elf on the Shelf sitting anywhere watching you, you might want to take the rest of the year off.

I might be weary of that door. The Halloween wreath was placed there, the door didn’t work. Now a Christmas decoration was placed there, the door works. You might want to stay clear of the door...........

girl6 said...

HAHAHAAHAHAHHAHA!!!!
Noooooooooooooooooooo wayyyyy.

i think where you guys are working is totally built on a hellmouth or something.
hahahahha. so crazy!!!!! stash some weapons in your desk. holy water....

K.O. said...

HA! A "giant dead Christmas shrimp"...that's a hilarious image!!! I can totally picture it. :'D Bah humbug!!