Thursday, July 3, 2014

Crickettes

I've often joked that the people who heat up disgusting-smelling food at work (violating laws of etiquette, human-decency, and the Universe) must logically eat crickets (assumption).

A coworker brought in a box of prepared crickets because her kids wanted her to snap a photo of me eating one.  For, you see, I'm the Halloween guy, so naturally I must eat bugs.  I found myself offended.  And disgusted by the notion of sour cream & onion crickets.

My brother and I used to have a few tree frogs as pets in a really cool vivarium.  This required the purchase of dozens of crickets over the years.  So you get to know what they smell and feel like.  And what squishes out of one when a sloppy frog starts to chomp one with its toothless mouth (not technically toothless, btw), similar to how Cookie Monster eats cookies.  Vile and gross.  Putrescent.

I hear we're one of the only nations on this planet who don't embrace the notion of consuming bugs as a food source.  And I'm perfectly fine with that.  I'm sure Renfield would say that I don't know what I'm missing.

Imagine eating these?
God, bacon & cheese crickets.

http://www.candycrate.com/crse3e.html?gclid=COettKqwqb8CFZRj7AodO2IAbA


16 comments:

Ann said...

Chili dusted crickets are a common snack food in Mexico. I've been to Oaxaca three times and seen piles of them on trays as street food. Haven't talked myself into trying them yet. My logic--why ruin a perfectly nice vacation? I was trying to talk myself into it, and a fellow traveler (who had done it before) suggested that if I did, get a little one "because they don't taste so much of cricket." That was enough to end it for me.

Anonymous said...

Ah, no. I won't be eating any bugs while I'm alive.

When I'm dead and in my grave, then they can go in my mouth all they want.

FatRanza said...

"For, you see, I'm the Halloween guy, so naturally I must eat bugs".

HAHA! Cracking me up!

Sara said...

Well, we were at Knott's last year and my husband and son (4 at the time) found some of these packages in a magic shop there.

They bought them. They ate them. They offered them to me. I said no. They both insisted they tasted just like a sour cream and onion chip(the flavor I think they got). Very crunchy and they said there really wasn't much to them. THEY FINISHED THE WHOLE PACKAGE.

Sara said...

Oh! And their insides (the crickets') were practically missing. So it was really just the outside.

Rot said...

I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

girl6 said...

hahahahha!!..that sounds like something Pinhead might possibly say (the terror & silence). : D

hey, i could totally see, bonkin Jiminy Cricket over the head
& then throwin his ass in the oven. i wouldn't eat em tho.

Damian Michael AKA HalloweeNut said...

I prefer the Fava Bean and Chianti flavor myself. :)

Willow Cove said...

Gosh, i still can't believe the things your coworkers will say to you. Since I take care of frogs and reptiles at work, we have large bathtub size bins of pinheads, 1/8's, and adults. The amount of poop they generate!and i consider them just slimmer, brown roaches.

Rot said...

we kept them in a small aquarium in between feedings...they were such filthy things. I can't imagine a tub full of them.

Pixel Pixie said...

The benefit of being a vegetarian is that, Halloween fiend or not, no one will expect me to eat a cricket.

Rot said...

: )

Rot said...

and the more i think about it, i'm shocked people wouldn't say stuff like "BUGS AIN'T LIVIN THINGS! EAT'M!"

MY coworkers would feel this way no doubt.

Autumnleaf said...

The house I lived in before this one was inundated with crickets. But I had a flock of chickens. Which went nutso over these things in the evenings so much that I named one of the hens
"Cricket" Now the only cricket I see in this house is the brass one I keep on the hearth. Go figure.

Ragged Grin said...

"don't taste so much of cricket"....that's awesome and disturbing all at once. I've swallowed a few things biking, running, etc. that made things interesting lets say. I don't ever wish to be able to give my taste test opinion on crickets.

Heather said...

Made me shudder and gag just thinking about it. Crickets are smelly and gross. Blech!